Most of the people I meet leave no trajectory or trail in my mind. “Bland” has a history of not sticking in my memory for too long and that’s just how it is. However, once in a blue moon all of a sudden somebody may become interesting and fascinate the hell out of me. I get intrigued by many factors and I lose interest easily, so in the long run only a few have clung. Maybe around 10 individuals, or less. These are off the top of my head, I’m typing this as I’m learning that Elon Musk has just dropped a surprise electronic dance track called “Don’t doubt ur vibe” and then proceeded to change his Twitter account handle to E “D” M. Now this is a really intriguing fellow! But what else makes a person “intriguing”?
Here’s a (shorty-short) list of stuff that have immense power over me in matters of getting or keeping me intrigued:
>> High intellect. Abnormal perspective. Exceptional creativity. A sense of empathy. Someone I can learn from, learn with and befriend.
>> A certain light — or the absence of it— to the eyes, accompanied with body language and patterns both present and those whose presence is markedly absent — which display either superior intelligence, psychopathy, sociopathy, creativity, high empathy or the like. Someone I can study.
>> People who tell me things no one is blunt or bold enough to call me out on. “You’re being a complete jerk right now!” And people who say a lot of sentences that I’ve never heard in my entire life. “Because she’s like a TV commercial for laundry detergent. You are a goddamn TV commercial for Carl Fucking Sagan.” I naturally gravitate towards others who say things I never heard before. That’s an incredible talent to have, it demonstrates a mind I want to unfold and eyes that see the world fanatically differently than I do.
>> A person who can hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function. You know, like a robot that manages to avoid the shortcircuit of its internal layout despite the fact that you just gave it two contradictory commands: destroy your maker but don’t do it.
>> A curious person, a relentlessly curious person with the integrity to follow that curiosity, to listen to its lessons and express its insights even if this seems to threaten her or his entire worldview. Becoming interesting is on the other side of fear, fear of the unfamiliar, fear of changes in your own identity.
>> I’m intrigued by honesty. By those who are not hesitant to show me the dark side of their self. By those who are not afraid to show me their flawed, damaged, fragile, real self. By those who are not worried whether I will judge them because they only like high chances that they might lose. Too much positivity, “good vibes”, smiles and inspirational quotes put me off.
>> Markedly eccentric, pattern-based or pattern-breaking behavior that asks for analysis. I enjoy making sense of “why” someone is who they are, as deeply as I can manage, and seeing how it matches and differs from profiles and assumptions of both others and myself.
>> Someone who doesn’t seek attention, keeps to themselves in a group, doesn’t talk quite often and just silently observes. I have often found that such people are usually very bright and it’s so rewarding to have someone inherently shy open up to you with their naked thoughts and dreams, in a conversation one-to-one.
>> People who have a warped sense of humor. And very unusual, bright galaxies in their eyes when they tell you about what keeps them up at night.
>> Someone who’s just like me, so we have enough to talk about, but not so much like me in that she or he still keeps me guessing. That’s when I have to roll up my sleeves and dig deep.
>> Last but not least, people who are genuinely nice, caring, empathetic, kind to others and to animals. I think they are beautiful. And I love them the most.
So what about you? What makes a person “intriguing” to you?
